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On Tuesday, August 11 at 11 a.m., Lauren Shuler Donner will be my guest live on my weekly talk show, “Leading the Way to Success.” Lauren is a former board member of Hollygrove and is the producer of "You’ve Got Mail", "Dave", "Pretty in Pink" and many more. Last year, Lauren made public the fact that she was diagnosed with Lupus 20 years ago. In addition, she is a breast cancer survivor. Tune in to listen and/or participate in the Chat room to hear her discuss her amazing leadership journey: www.blogtalkradio.com/coachjudynelson. You can call in your questions: 347.326.9791.
Read below for a personal story about my connection to Lauren.
LIKE ANY small town, Hollywood has its secrets, " declared the headline in an article by the Los Angeles Times. Some secrets are as carefully protected as a bank because, "acknowledging publicly that you're ill could mean instant unemployment.”
Now there’s a celebrity about whom there’s “no need to whisper,” the Times went on to say. Lauren Shuler Donner has Lupus.
Over the last two decades, Lauren has produced some of Hollywood's most popular -- and profitable -- films, including "Pretty in Pink," "St. Elmo's Fire," "Dave," "Mr. Mom," "Free Willy" and all the "X-Men" movies.
According to the Times, “No secret is as carefully guarded as a celebrity suffering with a chronic illness, but the A-list producer wants to end this conspiracy.”
Lauren was honored by the Lupus Foundation in June of 2008. In her acceptance speech, she said, “I want to show people that you can still live a life.”
And quite a life she has had! Not only with Lupus but also as a breast cancer survivor. Cured of her cancer, she is still living with lupus.
“I know there's a stigma that has made it hard for people to acknowledge it, if they're sick," Lauren told the Lupus Foundation audience. "I didn't tell anyone I had lupus for many, many years, and I didn't tell anyone I had cancer.
"I was afraid no one would hire me, and I also felt it was deeply personal. It was nobody's business,” she continued. "Now, of course, my feelings have changed." And, she has become a vocal spokesperson for lupus awareness.
I had the privilege of getting to know Lauren while I was the CEO of Hollygrove, a former orphanage in the heart of Hollywood where Marilyn Monroe spent two years in the 1930’s. Formerly, the Los Angeles Orphans Home Society founded in 1880, Hollygrove was renamed and evolved into a residential treatment agency for seriously abused, neglected and emotionally disturbed young children.
I walked into the library one afternoon and saw an attractive, petite young woman sitting in a chair with two kids piled on her lap. She was reading Charlotte’s Web to them, and they were spellbound. She did not look up when I walked by. I think she was so engrossed in her storytelling that she was oblivious to the rest of the world.
"Do you know who that is?" one of my staff asked. "No clue," I said.
"Lauren Shuler Donner."
"Oh?" I said. "Who is that?”
I had worked in the unglamorous section of Hollywood for more than two decades. But when you grow up in North Dakota, Hollywood celebrities aren’t exactly a prominent part of your consciousness.
"She’s a big Hollywood producer." Still no reaction from me.
"You’ve Got Mail?" she said. Now she had my attention. One of my favorite movies of all times. Now I was impressed.
The interesting thing was that I wasn’t the only person who didn’t know who she was. And that’s the way she liked it. She was there as a volunteer to help kids. She did not want publicity or acknowledgement of any kind. She wanted to help. From the peaceful looks on two kids who were rarely at peace, there wasn’t much question about the help she was giving in the library that day. And every day that she came.
Later, as I got to know her, it was clear that this was one rare lady. Soft spoken with a musical laugh, she is incredibly bright, creative and warm. She exuded an inner gentleness that’s hard to describe; in addition, I could sense something a little fragile but couldn’t quite put my finger on it.
When she was invited to become a member of Hollygrove’s Board of Directors, she hesitated. "But I won’t always be able to attend because of my schedule.” I assured her that what we wanted was her good mind—and that the fact she was so much closer to the children than most board members was a tremendous asset. She finally agreed and faithfully attended most Board meetings, which must have taken a lot of schedule rearranging, but she didn’t complain. She did not jump right in but listened carefully. When she asked questions, they were always thoughtful. As she became more active, her questions and comments became more pointed but came from a different perspective. Her input was invaluable.
Most important was her powerful interpersonal skills. Her graciousness was unfailing and a great source of positive connection for new and old board members alike.
When I learned just recently that she had lupus and was a breast cancer survivor, I wept. For some reason, the news really got to me. Perhaps that was the fragility I sensed. I’m not sure, but I do know one thing. There aren’t many people in this world as kind, caring, creative and genuine as Lauren Shuler Donner. To think she has to put up with this serious illness seems totally unfair.
I am looking forward to interviewing her on Tuesday, August 11, 2009, 11:00-12:00 noon, PDT. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/coachjudynelson . See you there!
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Judy is a coach unlike anyone I have ever encountered.… She inspired me to push myself into new areas as a manager and to become a leader who could help to inspire others...
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